Read the production script for Episode 6 of The Chronicles of Oz: The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. This script may differ slightly from the final released audio.
Episode Six
PREVIOUSLY:
Catch up on all the events of the previous five episodes.
OPENING CREDITS
INT. THRONE ROOM
The Scarecrow, Tin Woodman and Lion stress about the growing noise of an angry crowd outside. Dorothy rushes down the stairs.
OMBY AMBY
(distorted)
Great Oz? The people are coming, we need you!
TIN WOODMAN
The Wizard?
DOROTHY
Gone. Little bastard did a runner in a balloon. He’ll be sailing way across the skies and away from responsibility as we speak.
TIN WOODMAN
Great.
LION
That explains why the crowd outside sounds worse than it did before.
DOROTHY
Crowd?
TIN WOODMAN
They must have seen his balloon take off. Now they’ve all got questions.
LION
Questions they’re going to ask us.
DOROTHY
Questions we can’t really answer. I mean how do you tell people ‘oh, oops, sorry, your great ruler isn’t as wonderful as you thought. He’s really a big phoney and rather than tell you all himself he’s decided to run away and let these nobodies pass it on instead. Nobodies who, by the way, just killed two other significant people of government in your country and it’s gonna look darn suspicious that the Wizard disappeared just as you showed up’.
TIN WOODMAN
You’ve put a lot of thought into this.
DOROTHY
It’s a long staircase.
SCARECROW
I think we should tell them.
DOROTHY
What?
SCARECROW
The people have to know eventually. Let’s make it now rather than later.
TIN WOODMAN
Scarecrow, I don’t know if you’ve realised, but they’re going to blame us.
LION
They’ll think we melted him or dropped a house on him.
DOROTHY
They’ll want a scapegoat. They’re going to be scared, too much change at once isn’t good.
SCARECROW
Then we’ll have to reassure them. Isn’t that exactly why I got this brain in the first place? To use it for things like this?
DOROTHY
But it’s just stuffing!
SCARECROW
So’s the rest of me. I’m going out there.
DOROTHY
Scarecrow, wait –
SCARECROW
And you’re coming with me Dorothy.
DOROTHY
I am?
SCARECROW
I’ll need your help. Tin Woodman, open the door. I’m going to address the people.
TIN WOODMAN
Umm, ok. Was nice knowing you.
He opens the doors. Faramant, Jelia Jamb and Omby Amby stand there.
OMBY AMBY
Where’s the Wizard?
JELIA JAMB
We saw the balloon, has he really – was that him?
FARAMANT
He was a fake, wasn’t he! I knew it!
SCARECROW
See, Dorothy! They already know! This will be easy!
OMBY AMBY
Where is he? I have to see the Wizard!
DOROTHY
The Wizard of Oz has gone. Flown away. Looks like you’re stuck with us now.
OMBY AMBY
This is your fault Faramant!
FARAMANT
I didn’t make the Wizard run away!
OMBY AMBY
Yes you did! Yes you did!
SCARECROW
Quiet! It doesn’t matter whose fault it is. The fact is, he’s gone. Gone forever, and someone needs to tell everyone.
JELIA JAMB
Who? Who’s going to tell them?
EXT. EMERALD CITY SQUARE
The natives are very restless. The Scarecrow and Dorothy emerge at the steps of the palace and the Scarecrow begins a speech.
SCARECROW
People of the Emerald City. You probably don’t know who I am, so perhaps I should introduce myself. My name is the Scarecrow, and I understand you have a few questions. I hope I can answer them.
I am afraid I have some grave news. The Wonderful Wizard of Oz, the ruler of the City of Emeralds for so long, has abandoned you. He was in that balloon you all saw float away from the palace a few moments ago. He … he asked me to pass on his gratitude to you for being such good subjects for all these years and he hoped that you would all find … peace? Umm, love? Other happy things?
The crowd are getting restless – they don’t like this news.
SCARECROW
Now, now I ask you please do not panic! Yes, the Wizard is gone, but this is a great opportunity for the Emerald City to flourish under your own leadership! You don’t need a Wizard to protect you. To be honest, he wasn’t really protecting you anyway. The truth is, as I believe most of you have heard by now, the Wizard was a humbug. He was a fake. He had no real power or ability and has engaged the people of Oz in a massive deception for over twenty years.
The crowd gets nasty.
DOROTHY
Scarecrow, I think you need to change tactics.
SCARECROW
But listen to this! The Wizard was irrelevant! You don’t need a Wonderful Wizard to give you what you need. What he offered, you had in yourselves all along. You were the ones keeping the wicked witches away from your city – not the Wizard. The Wizard couldn’t stop a butterfly if he tried. You did it yourselves, and you can keep on doing it!
I would like to introduce you to the girl standing beside me. Her name is Dorothy Gale, and she’s both my first and my best friend in the world. She has shown me that so many things I thought were impossible are indeed possible. She’s just an ordinary girl with no extraordinary powers of any kind, yet in the short time she’s been in Oz she has freed both the Munchkins and the Winkies from their wicked enslavement. People of the Emerald City, I put it to you – has she not freed you from your own enslavement? You are free now to select your own ruler. Not a mysterious unseen Wizard who wasn’t doing anything for you anyway, but someone who will be good for Oz!
The Emerald Citizens cheer.
DOROTHY (V.O.)
I have never been more amazed at the Scarecrow than I was at that moment.
So despite yet another radical change in leadership for another region of Oz, calm returned to the Emerald City. Though the future was still uncertain, the Scarecrow had reassured them. Order had been restored.
INT. EMERALD CITY OFFICE
Omby Amby, Faramant and Jelia Jamb sit, despondent.
JELIA JAMB
It was a good speech.
FARAMANT
Very eloquent.
JELIA JAMB
That Scarecrow has a natural talent for leadership. Just saying.
FARAMANT
Was more inspiring in five minutes than the Wizard has been in twenty years.
OMBY AMBY
Stop it. Both of you.
Silence.
JELIA JAMB
We need to talk about what happens next.
OMBY AMBY
Who knows.
FARAMANT
The Wizard’s gone, Omby. Forever.
OMBY AMBY
Why haven’t we locked you up yet?
FARAMANT
Because I was right.
JELIA JAMB
And because we’re going to need his help to get through this.
OMBY AMBY
(chuckling)
Get through this? Idiots. There’s no getting through this.
JELIA JAMB
Omby…
OMBY AMBY
The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. Turns out he’s not wonderful. He’s not a wizard. Ha, he’s probably not even called Oz!
FARAMANT
Well, according to –
OMBY AMBY
And now he’s flown away and we’re all supposed to, what? Rule ourselves? Have an election? Do you know how long it’s been since Oz had an election? Before the Wizard there was the royal family. And unless you’re suggesting we go search for long lost Ozma…
JELIA JAMB
We can figure this out, Omby.
OMBY AMBY
(upset)
How? Seriously, how? How can you get anyone to lead us after… I trusted him. We all trusted him. He was Great and Terrible and he protected us and he’s… How could we miss it? And how can I even think about picking up these pieces? I just can’t do it.
JELIA JAMB
You can. We can. You’re not on your own, Omby. You have me. You have Faramant. We’re the Guardians of the Throne, the Gates and the People. Nowhere in that job description does it say anything about a Wizard. We’ll protect the Emerald City. We’ll lead it. Together.
OMBY AMBY
Thank you, Jelia.
JELIA JAMB
And first thing I think we should do is talk to that Scarecrow. The people seem to love him right now. We need to capitalise on that…
INT. CORRIDOR, EMERALD CITY
DOROTHY (V.O.)
Everyone was happy again. Except for me. For me, the reality had set in. I wasn’t going to get home. Ever. I’d taken to sitting alone with Toto in the throne room – nobody else was using it. I spoke to nobody but Toto and shut myself away. Again. Which began to worry my friends.
The Lion and the Tin Woodman approach the Throne Room door.
LION
She’s still in there?
TIN WOODMAN
Yep. Poor girl, can you imagine how she must be feeling?
LION
Her last hope for getting home and it was a phoney. She’d feel terrible.
TIN WOODMAN
More than terrible I’d say.
LION
But at least she doesn’t feel guilty.
TIN WOODMAN
Hmm?
LION
It’s just that, when I heard the Wizard had flown away without getting Dorothy back home, I almost felt happy. It’s wrong, I know, but I didn’t want Dorothy to leave. I think … I’d miss her.
TIN WOODMAN
I didn’t think you two got on?
LION
We don’t. But if she left and I hadn’t … I dunno, made things right… well perhaps now we’ll have a chance to be better friends?
TIN WOODMAN
She’s not happy here though.
LION
Why can’t she be? From what she’s said about Kansas, it’s bleak, colourless, boring and not-fun. Why wouldn’t Oz be a better place to live?
TIN WOODMAN
Yeah, with all the wicked witches, Kalidahs, fake wizards and deadly poppy fields, I can’t imagine why she wants to leave.
LION
I guess…
SCARECROW
(approaching)
And why are you two loitering around my throne room?
TIN WOODMAN
What do you mean your throne room? Who died and made you Wizard?
SCARECROW
Nobody, yet. But I’ve been off talking. And listening. Do you know how many people think I should take over as the ruler of the Emerald City? The people out there really like me!
TIN WOODMAN
Yes, well, I’m glad you’re topping the polls, your Royal Ozness, but instead of talking to the people perhaps you should talk to your friends? Dorothy’s upset.
LION
She’s locked herself in the throne room.
SCARECROW
Good! I want to talk to her. I just had a brilliant idea. Open the doors, please.
TIN WOODMAN
(sarcastic)
Oh, at once your Majesty…
FADE OUT
INT. THRONE ROOM
The Scarecrow, Tin Woodman and Lion enter to speak with Dorothy.
SCARECROW
Yoo-hoo, Dorothy!
DOROTHY
(melancholy)
Oh what do you want?
SCARECROW
I’ve got something to tell you.
TIN WOODMAN
Yeah, probably to tell you to get off his shiny throne.
DOROTHY
What?
SCARECROW
Ignore them. I’ve got an idea.
DOROTHY
(weary)
Uh oh.
SCARECROW
Shut up. I know how to get you back to Kansas! Call the Winged Monkeys!
LION
Not them again…
DOROTHY
Scarecrow, even before the Wizard gave you those brains you’ve come up with some stupid thoughts, but that one has to be the most insane, ridiculous, stupid, moronic of them all.
(a beat)
It just might work. Where’s that hat…
TIN WOODMAN
Scarecrow, are you serious?
SCARECROW
Totally. The Winged Monkeys can carry her across the Deadly Desert back to her home. It’s a great idea, right?
LION
I still don’t trust those monkeys…
TIN WOODMAN
Neither do I.
SCARECROW
They brought us to the Emerald City without problems didn’t they?
TIN WOODMAN
Yeah, and the time before that they killed us!
DOROTHY
Found it!
(reciting magic words)
Ep-pe, pep-pe, kak-ke!
Hil-lo, hol-lo, hel-lo!
Ziz-sy, zuz-zy, zik!
Crash of thunder and the Winged Monkeys appear as before.
WINGED MONKEY
You have summoned us for the third and final time. What do you command?
DOROTHY
I want you to take me home to Kansas please.
WINGED MONKEY
This we cannot do.
DOROTHY
Excuse me, I just gave you a command –
WINGED MONKEY
We cannot take you beyond the boundaries of Oz. That is our law.
DOROTHY
Please, can’t you try? This is the last chance I –
WINGED MONKEY
It is forbidden! Do not ask us this again. You still have one final command of the Winged Monkeys. We bid you farewell.
And they disappear
DOROTHY
Wait a minute, that’s not fair! Come back! Get back here! Nobody disappears on me and gets away with it. I’ll summon them back – Ep-pe, pep-pe –
TIN WOODMAN
Maybe think about what you’re doing before you summon them back to yell at them and they decide not to give you your final wish after all.
DOROTHY
But he … oh fine.
SCARECROW
Well that was disappointing. I was certain that one would work. Maybe this brain’s faulty – I wonder if I’ve got a guarantee…
TIN WOODMAN
Good luck trying to claim that one.
DOROTHY
Well now what? That was my last chance. Let’s face it, I’m stuck in Oz forever. I’ll never see Kansas again.
LION
Would that be so bad?
DOROTHY
What?
TIN WOODMAN
What he means is, Oz isn’t such a bad place to be stuck in. You might not have your Aunt and Uncle, but you’d have us!
DOROTHY
Look, I know you’re trying to help, but this isn’t my home. It’s not where I grew up, it’s not where my family is. Oz is colourful and beautiful, when it’s not dangerous and scary, but it’s not home.
Faramant knocks on the door.
FARAMANT
Ahem, excuse me. I couldn’t help overhearing…
DOROTHY
Who’s there?
FARAMANT
It’s just me. I don’t know if you remember, my name’s Faramant. I’m the Guardian of the Gates.
DOROTHY
What do you want?
FARAMANT
Well, it’s about your situation. Have you thought about asking Glinda for help?
DOROTHY
Glinda?
FARAMANT
The Witch of the South.
TIN WOODMAN
Now there’s an idea.
SCARECROW
Of course! Why didn’t I think of that?
TIN WOODMAN
Because you’re an idiot.
DOROTHY
I don’t know, I’ve had enough of meeting supposedly powerful beings who can’t help me.
FARAMANT
There’s nothing supposed about Glinda’s powers.
DOROTHY
I’ve heard that before.
FARAMANT
She rules over the Quadlings in the South in a castle that backs on to the Deadly Desert. She might know a way to cross it.
DOROTHY
She’s a good witch then?
FARAMANT
I’ve never heard anyone say a bad thing about her.
DOROTHY
That’s what they said about the Wizard until a few days ago.
LION
It’s worth looking into, surely?
TIN WOODMAN
Worst case scenario she doesn’t know, and you’re no worse off than you are now.
DOROTHY
That sounds familiar. Well, I guess it couldn’t hurt. I’ll go and see if this Glinda can help me.
TIN WOODMAN
That’s the spirit. I’ll get my oil can filled up, Lion if you could get some provisions for the trip.
SCARECROW
I’ll see what food we can get from the Palace kitchens.
TIN WOODMAN
The day’s still young, if we leave now we might even get there before nightfall.
DOROTHY
Wait – you’re all coming?
LION
Of course we are.
SCARECROW
Couldn’t let you go alone. Wouldn’t be right.
DOROTHY
But … you don’t have to do that. You’ve all got lives to get back to, now you’ve got what you wanted.
TIN WOODMAN
You haven’t got what you wanted yet. That was the deal – we all go to the Wizard and get our hearts’ desires. You haven’t gone home, so we’re not done yet.
LION
And you saved us all from the Wicked Witch. We owe it to you.
SCARECROW
And we’re you’re friends. How can we abandon you?
DOROTHY
Oh … oh you guys…. Right, well, let’s get started then. We’re actually doing this, another journey through Oz…
The four of them exit, leaving Faramant alone.
FARAMANT
Are you still there?
GLINDA
I’m here.
FARAMANT
So you heard. I told them what you asked me to.
GLINDA
You did very well.
FARAMANT
And you were right about what you said I’d hear at the throne room door. And I told everyone like you said to. But I have to ask –
GLINDA
Why I didn’t appear to Dorothy myself and help her? Because she still has much to learn.
FARAMANT
Like what?
GLINDA
They don’t know it yet, but those four individuals will be the greatest team Oz has ever encountered in its long history. But first they have to know it. And one last journey through the wilds of Oz will show them how well they work together.
FARAMANT
What if they don’t make it?
GLINDA
Oh, Faramant. After what you’ve seen of Dorothy and her friends thus far, do you doubt anything could stop them getting where they want to go?
EXT. QUADLING FOREST – AFTERNOON
Dorothy, the Scarecrow, the Tin Woodman and the Lion stroll through the undergrowth.
DOROTHY
Oh look, another forest. How novel.
LION
We are heading south, right?
SCARECROW
Yep. This is a completely different dark and scary forest in the wilderness of Oz.
DOROTHY
I’m telling you, if we come across a yellow brick road and my old farmhouse because we’ve gone in the wrong direction, I’ll not be happy.
TIN WOODMAN
At least if that happens we know how to get back to where we started. Been there, done that.
DOROTHY
Another three day walk back. Oh joy.
LION
I wouldn’t mind. I like being out of the city. Concrete walls and floors aren’t really what a wild Lion like myself can – aghhh!
SCARECROW
What?
LION
Something touched me!
TIN WOODMAN
It’s a branch.
LION
No it wasn’t, something scraped across my back!
TIN WOODMAN
Yes. A branch.
SCARECROW
What happened to all that courage you were supposed to have?
LION
I sobered up.
TREE
(deep, threatening, distorted voice)
Keep Away!
DOROTHY
Did you just hear what I just heard?
SCARECROW
I think we imagined it.
TIN WOODMAN
Yeah, we imagined it. In one of those weird, collective imaginations where all four of us imagine the same thing at once.
DOROTHY
All five of us. Toto heard it too.
LION
Ok, I vote we all go back to the Emerald City.
SCARECROW
Don’t be a scaredy-cat, this place is perfectly safe. See, I’ll walk in front and show you all that – ahhhhh!
DOROTHY (V.O.)
In one swift motion, the branch of a nearby tree curved inwards, grabbed the Scarecrow in its twig-like fingers and flung him back across the forest.
TREE
Keep away! Visitors are not welcome!
DOROTHY
What, Glinda doesn’t like having visitors?
TIN WOODMAN
We’re not near Glinda’s place yet, this is something different. Scarecrow are you all right?
SCARECROW
I’m fine. What a rude tree!
(to the trees)
Yeah, you heard me! Rude!
DOROTHY
Yeah, go on, antagonize the killer trees, that’s smart. So what do we do now, go around?
TIN WOODMAN
That will take too long. Nevermind, this is why Lurline invented axes…
SCARECROW
Careful Tin Woodman, they’re strong.
TREE
Keep away!
TIN WOODMAN
I don’t think so.
He starts chopping away. The trees howl in anger and pain.
TIN WOODMAN
Ok, get through the gap. Quickly!
LION
You first.
DOROTHY
Oh you wimps, out of my way…
They scramble through the branches. A branch lashes at the Scarecrow.
SCARECROW
Help, it’s got me, it’s got me again! Help! Help!
TIN WOODMAN
Just a second, I’ll get you free –
The branch snaps with a comic ‘twaaang’. The Scarecrow screams as he’s flung very far away.
TIN WOODMAN
Did anyone see where he went?
DOROTHY
Up into the air.
LION
And over that giant china wall!
Pause
DOROTHY
Why is there a great wall of china in the middle of the forest?
FADE OUT
EXT. CHINA COUNTRY
The Scarecrow continues his scream as he flies over the wall and comes to land. There’s the tinkle of fine china breaking.
SCARECROW
Oww. I think I broke something.
(pause)
I broke this thing. This … little building. I broke a building! Cool!
A little China Vicar runs out of the church, hopping mad. He speaks with a tinny little china voice.
CHINA VICAR
Oi! Oi you! You big oaf! Look what you’ve done to my church you big, giant, church-wrecking person!
SCARECROW
Oh, aren’t you cute! A tiny little vicar made out of china!
CHINA VICAR
You’ve broken the roof right off it! It’ll take ages to fix that!
SCARECROW
I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to break it. It’s just that the fighting trees threw me and I – hang on…
DOROTHY (V.O.)
As the Scarecrow looked around him, he could see that the town he had landed in was made of china. Dainty china, like you have in fine tea sets. Every building, every tree, every person –
CHINA VICAR
Oi! Pay attention to me when I am yelling at you!
SCARECROW
Sorry. I didn’t mean to break your church, I really didn’t. It can’t be that hard to fix, let me look at it, a drop of glue should…
Another tinkle, a moo and a cry of pain.
CHINA MILKMAID
My leg! You scared the cow and the cow broke my leg!
SCARECROW
Oh, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to –
CHINA VICAR
What, like you didn’t mean to break my church?
The china people gather together and get angry.
SCARECROW
Well it’s not my fault you’re all so fragile. I’m just a poor Scarecrow you know, just trying not to hurt anyone. You don’t have to … form a mob… or anything…
He backs up and we hear another tinkle.
SCARECROW
Gulp. That was a poor little china puppy…
CHINA VICAR
Get him!
The china people rush him.
SCARECROW
Whoah! This is just a misunderstanding! You’re all so breakable! Dorothy! Tin Woodman! Help!!!
He runs away and the china people give chase.
EXT. CHINA WALL – CONTINUOUS
DOROTHY (V.O.)
While the Scarecrow was running for his life from the angry little china people, the rest of us had managed to find a way to scale the wall. Peering over the edge, even we couldn’t quite believe what we were seeing.
TIN WOODMAN
I think that has to be a record. Quickest ever pissing off people after arriving in a town.
DOROTHY
Tell that to the Wicked Witch of the East.
LION
We’re going to have to go down there and save him, aren’t we?
DOROTHY
What?
LION
Look over there.
DOROTHY
Oh great…
TIN WOODMAN
They’re not trying to build a bonfire, surely? They’re going to burn him at the stake!
DOROTHY
Good luck burning china.
EXT. CHINA COUNTRY – CONTINUOUS
Close up on the Scarecrow. The mob are preparing to burn him.
SCARECROW
Really, I don’t think it’s a good idea to sacrifice me or whatever you’re doing.
CHINA PRINCESS
For the inexcusable crimes of damaging a holy building, maiming an innocent milkmaid and the murder of one of the Queen’s prize-winning corgis, we find the prisoner guilty, and his sentence of execution by fire will be carried out immediately!
SCARECROW
Fire! No, no, please, you’re making a big mistake! I didn’t mean to break your little town, it could happen to anyone! No, put out that fire please, if there’s one thing in the world scarier than a Wicked Witch it’s a lighted match. Please, straw is so easily burnt! Stop! Please! Help me someone!
The Lion roars magnificently in the distance. The china people panic.
DOROTHY
(from afar)
We’re coming Scarecrow!
SCARECROW
Dorothy! Lion, Tin Woodman! Quickly, untie me!
They race up to the Scarecrow and untie him.
CHINA PRINCESS
Stop them! They must not get away! They must face the justice of the Dainty China Country!
TIN WOODMAN
This way, we’ll climb out the other side!
DOROTHY
Run Scarecrow!
SCARECROW
I’m coming!
DOROTHY
Quickly, climb the wall! I’ll help you!
CHINA PRINCESS
They’re getting away! Stop them!
SCARECROW
Bye-bye china people!!!
TIN WOODMAN
Oh just get over the wall already!
CHINA PRINCESS
Stop them! Stop them! Stop them!!!!
EXT. FOREST
The four push their way through trees and undergrowth.
DOROTHY (V.O.)
Of all our adventures in Oz that was, well, unique.
Anyway, we were back in the forest, pushing past more trees, starting to feel nostalgic for the days where we actually had a road to follow. It may have had huge chasms and went under rivers in places, but at least it was brick. The paths through Quadling Country were dirt at best, and only if you were lucky. And as the sun disappeared behind the trees and it got darker and darker, well, it wasn’t long before we stopped making progress and began tripping over things.
Crash of tin on dirt.
TIN WOODMAN
Dorothy, if I fall over this dog one more time…
DOROTHY
Here boy, come here, let me carry you for a while. Just ignore the big bad Tin Woodman…
SCARECROW
How long does this forest go on do you think?
LION
No idea. I thought we’d be through it by now.
TIN WOODMAN
We’re probably going round in circles. Not hard for us to do in this light.
DOROTHY
Perhaps it’s time we set up camp?
LION
I’m not sure this place is very safe.
DOROTHY
Well it’s either that or keep stumbling through the undergrowth all night.
SCARECROW
I don’t like the sound of either choice to be honest.
TIN WOODMAN
Me neither.
DOROTHY
Well I’m open to suggestions.
LION
How about we –
He’s cut off by lots of scary hysterical laughter in the distance. Like every scary clown you have ever heard of.
DOROTHY
How can someone laughing sound so scary?
SCARECROW
Perhaps we should investigate?
LION
Perhaps we shouldn’t?
DOROTHY
(hesitant)
Well, you never know. It may be friendly laughter and we’re so freaked out by this forest that we’re just –
More laughter, followed by screaming.
DOROTHY
Yeah, ok, that wasn’t funny laughing.
TIN WOODMAN
We have to help them.
SCARECROW
Absolutely.
They rush to the source of the screams.
EXT. FOREST CLEARING
Lots of various animals gathered together in one place. The hysterical laughing continues from afar.
DOROTHY (V.O.)
We raced through the forest towards the screams, and before long we came upon a clearing. There were dozens of animals of all kinds – tigers, elephants, bears, wolves, and many more too numerous to name. It was like walking into the Topeka Zoo, if they’d taken down the walls and opened the cages.
The place was in chaos. So many animals were wounded with their fellow beasts attending to them. The others were just scared. They all needed help.
Nearest to me was a small tiger with a torn arm. I was no vet, but I knew some first aid and hoped that counted for something.
DOROTHY
Easy, easy, I just want to help. Let me look at your paw… My name’s Dorothy.
TIN WOODMAN
What happened here?
TIGER
Hammer Heads. They’re on the move again, spreading deeper and deeper into the forest.
TIN WOODMAN
Hammer Heads? Fantastic.
DOROTHY
You know them?
TIN WOODMAN
Heard stories. Creatures with no arms, stumpy legs but big heads that crush people, right?
TIGER
Yeah. They usually stay on the plains to the south, but recently they’ve been on the move. Today they attacked the forest. We all had to escape.
SCARECROW
That’s how you got injured? The Hammer Heads hurt you?
TIGER
We’re the lucky ones. There’s so many that didn’t get out of their path. But we’ll be fine now. Now that you’re here, your Majesty.
SCARECROW
Huh? I’m not –
TIGER
I meant –
(he howls in pain)
DOROTHY
Sorry, I’m being gentle as I can. You need a bandage…
LION
You can’t be talking about me, surely?
TIGER
You’re a lion, aren’t you? The King of Beasts.
LION
Only technically.
TIGER
Then we are saved. You can defeat the Hammer Heads for us.
TIN WOODMAN
That’s ridiculous, you can’t just say he’s a king because he’s a lion. That’s like saying Dorothy’s queen because she’s a girl.
LION
Animal royalty works differently, Tin Woodman, you wouldn’t understand.
TIGER
You have to defeat them before they kill us all.
LION
Ok.
SCARECROW
What?
TIN WOODMAN
Ok? Did he say ok?
DOROTHY
Lion, what are you saying?
LION
I’ll help you. I’m a lion, King of Beasts. It’s my duty.
DOROTHY
But you can’t – you can see what these Hammer Heads are doing to the animals. It’ll be suicide.
LION
The Wizard gave me courage, remember. I think it’s time I used it. Tell me how to find these monsters.
Hysterical laughter, very nearby.
DOROTHY
I think they’ve found you…
TIGER
Oh no, they’ve found us. They’ve found us!
Crash! Trees collapse as the Hammer Heads burst their way into the clearing. Their laughter is piercing.
DOROTHY (V.O.)
And there they were. The Hammer Heads in all their glory. Up close they were quite short and stumpy, with no arms to speak of. But they had big heads with flat tops that sprang up on very long necks causing damage wherever they landed. They burst through the trees dropping limbs and debris onto the wounded animals. And that laugh, that screeching, horrible laugh they made as they did it. I think I will never forget it.
TIN WOODMAN
We have to get everyone away from here!
SCARECROW
Too late, they’ve got us surrounded!
TIN WOODMAN
Oh crap.
The Lion roars at them.
SCARECROW
You’re not still going to fight them are you?
LION
I have to. Look after everyone!
The Lion bounds away.
TIN WOODMAN
Lion, come back, it’s impossible!
SCARECROW
You’ll be squished! And you’re not made of straw, you won’t bounce back!
(quieter)
There goes one brave cowardly lion.
TIN WOODMAN
There’ll be one very flat cowardly lion before long. Look out! Here comes another one!
Blaam! The Hammer Head’s head hits the ground with the force of an explosion. Various animals squeal and cry as the monsters keep laughing.
TIN WOODMAN
That’s it, I’m getting in on this. Let’s see how you like the feel of this axe!
The Tin Woodman jumps into the fray, swinging his axe at them.
DOROTHY
They’re going to destroy everyone! All these wounded animals who can’t protect themselves! We have to do something!
SCARECROW
I agree, but what? These Hammer Heads are too powerful.
DOROTHY
I know. But we can’t just –
SCARECROW
Dorothy, look out!
She shrieks and jumps out of the way as another Hammer Head punches the trees near her, dropping heavy branches.
DOROTHY
That was close.
SCARECROW
We’re never going to win this. There’s too many of them! And they’re too big!
DOROTHY
They’re ‘too’ a lot of things. But try telling the Lion that.
SCARECROW
Look out, here comes another head!
Blaam! They dive aside again.
DOROTHY
They’re going to kill everyone here, us included! This is insane!
SCARECROW
More insane than going up against a Wicked Witch?
DOROTHY
At least we had a chance with her once she’d abandoned the … oh God, that’s it! The Golden Cap!
SCARECROW
Summoning the Winged Monkeys again, are you sure?
DOROTHY
What have we got to lose? Give me a second to put it on –
SCARECROW
The Lion won’t let you fight them on his behalf. He won’t let them rescue him either.
DOROTHY
I know. That’s not what I’ll ask them.
(rapidfire)
Ep-pe, pep-pe, kak-ke!
Hil-lo, hol-lo, hel-lo!
Ziz-zy, zuz-zy, zik!
Thunder cracks and the Winged Monkeys arrive.
WINGED MONKEY
You have called us for the third and final time. What is your comm-
Blaaam!
DOROTHY
How many monkeys do you have under your command?
WINGED MONKEY
We have many in a legion. Do you wish the Winged Monkeys to do battle?
DOROTHY
No, I want you to rescue these animals! Most of them are wounded, and the Hammer Heads have us surrounded. If they stay here they’ll die.
WINGED MONKEY
This we can do. However –
DOROTHY
Yes?
WINGED MONKEY
Rescuing the wounded will fulfil your final command. We will not be permitted to rescue you as well.
DOROTHY
I know. I thought as much. But we can look after ourselves, these animals can’t. Will you do it?
SCARECROW
Please!
WINGED MONKEY
This is your command. The Winged Monkeys will obey.
DOROTHY (V.O.)
They went to work. While the Lion and the Tin Woodman continued to keep the attention of most of the Hammer Heads, the Winged Monkeys swooped in between their thrusting necks to the wounded animals scattered about the clearing. Quickly and smoothly they picked them up and whisked them into the sky. Within minutes the clearing was empty, with the exception of the five of us and the dozen or so Hammer Heads bearing down upon us. I made my way across to the Lion, who was getting weary from his battle.
LION
(out of breath)
Dorothy! What happened to the animals?
DOROTHY
The Winged Monkeys. I asked them to help.
LION
I can’t leave, I have to –
DOROTHY
Relax. That was my last wish. They can’t help us, we’re stuck.
LION
Oh. You should have left with them.
DOROTHY
Not a chance. I’m going to help you.
LION
Why?
DOROTHY
Because that’s what friends do, you dolt!
LION
Even if it means your certain death? Cause I have to say, these Hammer Heads are tougher than they look!
Blaam, a tree falls nearby.
DOROTHY
You’re not kidding. But hey, I’m still here. Still helping you out where I can. Even if it means they…
The Tin Woodman crashes to the ground.
LION
Tin Woodman!
TIN WOODMAN
They’re … they’re too strong. We can’t defeat them Lion. They’re going to crush us.
LION
We have to keep fighting, Tin Woodman.
SCARECROW
(from afar)
Hey! Hey, wait for me! They’re after me!
DOROTHY
Scarecrow, over here! Quickly!
The Scarecrow rushes up.
SCARECROW
All the animals are gone. It’s just us left.
Blaam!
DOROTHY
Not for much longer.
LION
I told you all to get away while you can. I’ll hold them off.
DOROTHY
Not a chance.
TIN WOODMAN
Ain’t going to happen.
SCARECROW
If we’re going to get smooshed, we’ll all be smooshed together.
Toto barks.
SCARECROW
Toto too.
LION
You’re all crazy. You know that right? Insane.
DOROTHY
Better insane than on your own, right?
TIN WOODMAN
Look out everyone. They’re coming in for their next attack!
They all scream and yell and roar as they take their final stand against the Hammer Heads, while they laugh and smash the world around them. The damage sounds immense and very, very final.
Then just as all seems lost, the five of them disappear in a flash of magic.
INT. GLINDA’S PALACE
A very serene atmosphere in contrast to the previous scene. A peaceful fountain bubbles in the distance and a wind-chime tinkles in the breeze.
Dorothy and her friends appear in a blast of magic and pause momentarily.
DOROTHY
That was weird.
LION
Are we dead?
TIN WOODMAN
If we are, then it was a lot less painful than the last time.
SCARECROW
And I didn’t think heaven was so … royal-like.
LION
What happened to the Hammer Heads?
DOROTHY
I guess they’re still in the forest.
LION
Right. What happened to the forest?
DOROTHY
I think it turned into a palace?
Glinda steps out from a nearby doorway.
GLINDA
You are in the Palace of Glinda at the southernmost edge of the Quadling Country.
SCARECROW
(jumping)
Yeaough!
GLINDA
(laughing)
There’s no need to be afraid, Scarecrow. You are quite welcome here. You would not have been rescued from the brink of death if you were not.
TIN WOODMAN
You know who he is?
GLINDA
I know you all. The Scarecrow, the Tin Woodman, the Lion. And Dorothy Gale with her dog Toto. Welcome to my palace. My name is Glinda.
DOROTHY
The Witch of the South?
GLINDA
Some people call me that. I prefer Sorceress, personally, it has a touch more elegance.
DOROTHY
Then you’re the person I’ve been looking for!
GLINDA
Yes I know. I have been following your adventures for some time now, and I must say I am so glad to meet you all in person at long last. I finally have the chance to offer you my congratulations and my gratitude.
DOROTHY
Huh?
GLINDA
What you have done for Oz has been nothing short of amazing. The evil empires have been toppled, the board swept clean. Oz owes you a debt, Dorothy.
DOROTHY
I don’t understand…
GLINDA
Were you not responsible for the destruction of the two Wicked Witches and the removal of the humbug Wizard from the Emerald City?
DOROTHY
Well, yes, but not on purpose!
GLINDA
That’s the beauty of what you’ve done, your lack of ill intention. Had you deliberately travelled through Oz overthrowing our rulers then I would have been less inclined to allow you entry to my palace. You may not have planned to improve the lives of the Ozian people, but that’s exactly what you’ve achieved. The Munchkins, the Winkies and the Emerald Citizens can now move forward with new, better rulers who will work with their people and not try to control them. On behalf of Oz, I thank you.
DOROTHY
Umm, you’re welcome?
TIN WOODMAN
Just a minute, you said you’ve been watching us, right?
GLINDA
Through every step on the Yellow Brick Road, past every poppy and every emerald –
TIN WOODMAN
Then you must have seen the stuff we’ve been through, Kalidahs and Winged Monkeys and crazy china people… why did you wait until now to rescue us?
SCARECROW
We sure could have used your help back in Winkieland when the Winged Monkeys were ripping us apart.
LION
Or when we were trapped on a raft in the Munchkin River.
GLINDA
Those trials were completely within your ability to resolve, I had no need to interfere. Besides, it was important that I not be seen to be involved in your journey. Of course, I helped where I could – you may recall a convenient bucket of water was left for you. But it was only after you chose to sacrifice yourselves in the place of those weaker than you that I felt it was time I could act directly. It is clear to me now – it is the destiny of all four of you to lead Oz into a great and golden future!
SCARECROW
Really?
DOROTHY
Look, your highness –
GLINDA
Call me Glinda, please –
DOROTHY
Glinda – this is all flattering, but I don’t really want to lead Oz anywhere. All I’ve wanted right from the start is to go home to my Aunt Em and Uncle Henry. I didn’t want to kill witches and chase out wizards, all that just happened. If it’s good for Oz, that’s fantastic, I’m happy for you – but I still just want to go home.
GLINDA
That is a shame.
DOROTHY
I’m sorry.
GLINDA
I foresee a great future for you here. A princess of the realm of Oz, bringing joy and laughter to every Ozian, helping its rulers maintain peace and happiness.
SCARECROW
Wow!
TIN WOODMAN
Can’t really turn that down now, can you Dorothy?
DOROTHY
Watch me. It does sound wonderful, Glinda, but my mind is made up. I have to go home. If you can help me, then please let me know but if you can’t then say so I’ll waste no more of your time –
GLINDA
Of course, I would be very happy to show you how to get home, Dorothy. But first I require something from you.
DOROTHY
Here we go again…
GLINDA
I ask only for the Golden Cap that commands the Winged Monkeys.
DOROTHY
Oh. Oh, is that all? Yes, fine, absolutely, take it. It’s useless to me now anyway, I’ve used up its three wishes.
GLINDA
Indeed. However I think I shall need the Winged Monkeys exactly three times. As I said before, I foresee great futures for all of you in Oz. Scarecrow, whether you realise it or not, you have one of the sharpest, brightest and wisest brains in Oz. My first command of the Winged Monkeys after Dorothy has returned home will be to return you to the Emerald City. Once there you will fill the void left by the Wizard of Oz and rule the Emerald City as their king.
SCARECROW
What? Me, King of the Emerald City!?!
TIN WOODMAN
Oh don’t act like this is a surprise!
GLINDA
The Emerald Citizens already respect you for your wisdom and knowledge. With my support they will happily accept you as their sovereign. I’m certain you are up to the challenge.
SCARECROW
I don’t know … I haven’t had much experience ruling.
GLINDA
Few rulers have. But I feel you will be a wonderful ruler.
SCARECROW
Am I really wonderful?
GLINDA
You are unusual.
(she moves to the next in line)
Tin Woodman, I would like for the Winged Monkeys to return you to Winkieland and ensure the Winkies do not succumb to the same fate as the Munchkins. The Winkies are no doubt still grateful for their freedom, but after so long under the Wicked Witch of the West’s thrall, they need someone to guide them and show them how to think for themselves once more. In the wild and desolate wastelands of the west, I can think of nobody more likely to thrive than a man made of metal.
TIN WOODMAN
I … I never thought that –
GLINDA
Now, as for the Lion –
LION
Don’t tell me – you want me to take over Munchkinland? They are the only ones left without a ruler.
GLINDA
Munchkinland is no longer safe for any of us. Various factions are still fighting for power as we speak, and it will be some time before their revolution is over. No, Lion, I thought it best if my final command to the Winged Monkeys was to take you to the animals you recently rescued from the Hammer Heads. As you know, their numbers have been decimated and those that remain are injured. They need someone with the courage to protect them and ensure they are safe.
LION
That’s what I would have asked you for. Thank you.
GLINDA
And upon their final return, I will then give the Golden Cap to the Winged Monkeys themselves, so that they will be free once more. I think they have repaid their debt.
DOROTHY
That’s wonderful. It’s great, it really is, but this doesn’t tell me how I’m supposed to get home.
GLINDA
Dorothy, you have had the power to go home all the time. Had you known you would have been able to return the very morning you first arrived in Oz.
DOROTHY
What?
GLINDA
The Silver Slippers you wear on your feet contain the answer.
DOROTHY
So… you want me to start walking?
GLINDA
You’re aware that they contain a great power, but few know the true extent of their magic. The Witch of the West knew, that’s why she wanted them. The Wizard feared them so much he fled. They have many wonderful powers, including the ability to carry you to any place in the world in only three steps, and each step would be made in the wink of an eye. All you have to do is click your heels together three times and command the shoes to carry you wherever you want to go.
DOROTHY
You’re kidding?
GLINDA
Absolutely not.
DOROTHY
I’ve had the power to go home all this time? Why didn’t you tell me sooner?
GLINDA
Because if you had left as soon as you arrived, Oz would have been the worse for it.
SCARECROW
I’d be still on my pole.
TIN WOODMAN
I’d still be rusted solid in the forest.
LION
I’d have been a coward forever.
DOROTHY
That’s … true I guess. So when can I go home?
GLINDA
Any time you wish. Unless you would like to reconsider staying?
DOROTHY
No, no we’d had better leave as soon as possible. The sooner Aunt Em and Uncle Henry know I’m alive the better.
SCARECROW
(distressed)
Right now? Really? But it’s so quick!
DOROTHY
Yes, right away cause – oh. Look, it’s not that I want to leave you behind, it’s just that –
TIN WOODMAN
It’s all right Dorothy.
LION
We understand, they need you.
DOROTHY
I’ll … I’ll miss you, you know. Really.
TIN WOODMAN
(emotional)
Hah, liar.
DOROTHY
Oh don’t you start crying, you’ll set me off. Give me a hug.
(she hugs him)
Lion, you be brave too ok.
LION
Dorothy … I accept your apology. You know, from back at the Witch’s castle, I’m sorry I was so –
DOROTHY
Oh Lion, now I am going to cry.
(she hugs him too)
Scarecrow, I –
SCARECROW
(crying)
I don’t want you to go!
DOROTHY
Oh Scarecrow –
SCARECROW
You were my first friend in the world, and now I have to rule this Emerald City and I don’t know how to do it and I need your help I can’t do this on my own –
DOROTHY
You have help, you have the Tin Woodman and the Lion and Glinda, they’ll all help you. You’ll be fine.
SCARECROW
But I’ll … I’ll miss you.
DOROTHY
I know. Who wouldn’t? And I’ll miss you too. All of you. I can’t tell you how much.
(she sniffs and pulls herself together)
All right. I’m ready now. So I just…
GLINDA
Tap your heels together three times and tell the shoes where you want to go.
DOROTHY
Right. Goodbye everyone! Don’t forget me!
She taps the heels together three times, and they echo with a magical clink on each tap. A magic builds from them.
DOROTHY
Take me home to Aunt Em!
A blast of magic and Dorothy is whisked away.
SCARECROW
So that’s it then. Dorothy’s gone.
TIN WOODMAN
It’s all over.
LION
At last.
GLINDA
Dorothy will return one day. I am sure of this. It’s far from being all over, my friends. This is only the beginning of something marvellous…
EXT. KANSAS
The remains of the old farmhouse, some time after the twister. Aunt Em and Uncle Henry are working through the wreckage.
UNCLE HENRY
Marvellous. Fricken marvellous. Hardly anything left.
AUNT EM
(upset)
Henry…
UNCLE HENRY
House is gone. Probably in bits all over the county. Half the barn caved in. The stock’s been lost.
AUNT EM
I know.
UNCLE HENRY
The bank was barely going to help us before, they’ll do nothing at all now.
AUNT EM
Henry.
UNCLE HENRY
I mean there’s insurance I guess but who knows when they’ll pay out –
AUNT EM
(in tears)
Henry stop!
UNCLE HENRY
Em?
AUNT EM
She’s not coming back, is she?
UNCLE HENRY
Oh Em…
AUNT EM
If she was, we’d have found her by now. She’d have wandered along going ‘tra-la-la-la, here I am, I’m not … not…’
UNCLE HENRY
Don’t do this to yourself.
AUNT EM
(very upset)
She’s gone and you’re going on and on about barns and stock and banks and –
UNCLE HENRY
(holding her as she breaks down)
Em, Em! Of course she’s coming back. You’ve got to have hope. She’ll find us. And when she does, we’ll rebuild our house, and everything will be wonderful. You’ll see.
AUNT EM
Wonderful? How can anything be wonderful again?
In the distance, Toto barks. Almost unnoticed to begin with, but then Em stops sobbing.
AUNT EM
Can you hear that?
UNCLE HENRY
It’s just a dog, Em.
AUNT EM
No, no it’s not, it’s Toto.
UNCLE HENRY
Em, come on…
AUNT EM
It’s Toto I tell you, it’s –
DOROTHY
(from afar)
Aunt Em! Uncle Henry! Aunt Em!
UNCLE HENRY
I don’t believe it…
Dorothy and Toto rush to Aunt Em and Uncle Henry, laughing all the way, as the final voice over begins.
DOROTHY (V.O.)
The shoes were gone. They fell off during the journey back, lost in the desert. But I didn’t care. I was barefoot on the dusty dirt of Butterfield Road, but I didn’t care. I was home. And there was my family.
Sometimes your world changes in the space of a minute. A second. A moment. Everything you knew blown away on a gust of wind. And it’s in those moments you learn to really appreciate the world as it was. The world you’ve left behind.
You can’t always get that world back. And if you do, it’s forever changed. Or you are. For better, for worse, who knows? I didn’t know it then, and at that moment I didn’t care. But even though I was back home, in Kansas… nothing was ever going to be the same again.
DOROTHY
Aunt Em, I’m so glad to be home again!
DOROTHY (V.O.)
But I guess that’s what happens, when you find yourself in Oz.
CLOSING CREDITS